


Thinking back

by ChazMoon123



Category: IT (2017), IT - Stephen King
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Bill's so nice guys, Boys Being Boys, First Kiss, Fluff, I have no idea what I'm doing guys, I'm Sorry, M/M, MY SONS, Possible Smut?, from Richie's perspective, i'll stop tagging, maybe? - Freeform, more kissing?, they are both precious
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-26 02:28:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17133332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChazMoon123/pseuds/ChazMoon123
Summary: Richie has no self control, basically. That's all you have to know.





	Thinking back

The teacher's monotone voice sounded like a distant murmur in his ears as Richie stared at Bill's back from a few desks behind him, following the lines of his broad shoulders to where his waistline disappeared behind the chair he was sitting in. He didn't even register his staring as weird, not until Mike swatted his shoulder at lunch break and brought him back from his mind palace.

"Are you okay Rich? You seem really out of it."

"Yeah, sure. I'm jolly well," Richie made a terrible attempt at a British accent to answer his friend's concerned tone "Don't worry about me Mikey."

Mike didn't look very convinced, but he didn't push the matter any further. Which meant Richie could let his mind wander again.

He had been thinking about the first time he acknowledged how strong Bill was going to become. When he had rode behind Bill on the back of Silver, watching his muscles work as he moved the too big bike for an eleven-year-old to use forward. Bill had been taller and stronger than him already, and Richie looked up to him a lot. Both physically and figuratively. He was confident and earnest despite his stutter, always loyal and sincere, so gentle and understanding. Richie couldn't believe how unfair it was that it was Bill whose brother had to be taken away by that monster.

Yeah, maybe he actually had a crush on the guy. No surprise there, most of the Losers had one as far as he could sense. But they were older now, and he hadn't given it much thought, not until that day in class. Staring Bill down wasn't something he did a lot.

Sure, Bill was handsome, tall and had muscle. Richie was mostly just tall and kinda lanky, but Bill was still a bit taller than him. When he really thought about it, the idea of Bill pushing him up against a wall instead of bullies pushing him into lockers definitely gave him shivers. He blamed that on his hormones though.

Because Bill was his best friend, after everything they had been through with the rest of their club, after all those years, they were still very close. Bill's parents were still shadows of their former selves, still rather cold towards Bill, and Richie was happy to spend time with him. Try to help him forget how cold and empty his house felt when he was actually home.

They would watch movies or read comics, ride their bikes around town and hang out. Just the two of them, or hit up someone from the Losers and spend time together like that. Bill would often tell Richie that he didn't want to bother him, waste his time or whatever other excuse he could think of. Richie of course would dismiss those ideas. He would always reassure him that spending time with Bill was never a waste. And Bill would always be so grateful, smile so warmly Richie was sure something was wrong with his stomach.

Yeah, Richie liked to talk big. He was called Trashmouth for a reason. There was a lot of garbage exiting his mouth on a daily basis. He was a shittalker and he was proud of that most of the time, wearing it as a badge of honour. He often joked how he would bang Eddie's mom, how this and that girl had blown him countless times, maybe even a few guys.

But now, looking at Bill, thinking of all the things they shared, all the things he loved about Bill, he couldn't help but feel like somebody had taped his mouth shut. Because it was Big Bill.

The guy who was very humble and shy despite the confidence he had built up over the years. Who would duck his head and blush after showing his short stories to Richie, shaking his head with a small smile at hearing how much Richie likes them. Refusing the compliments of how talented he is. The fact that Bill only showed them to him made Richie feel like he was at the top of the world.

The thought of losing that deep level of trust seriously scared Richie. More than he ever thought it would. It was easier to ignore the butterflies in his belly than to confront his feelings. That was the Richie way at least, and that was what he told himself. He didn't even want to toy around with the idea of talking about this with Bill. He was scared of what the taller teen would think of him. Deep down he knew Bill would never push him away because of something like this, even if Richie's feelings weren't mutual.

He was still pretty distracted nowadays, almost missing Bill calling out for him as he unlocked his bike from the holder in front of the school building.

"What?"

"I asked if you wanted to hang out today." Bill said again. He didn't stutter as much anymore. He practiced his speech a lot, did special exercises and talked slower for better results. He still stuttered sometimes, but not nearly as frequently.

"You bet!" Richie grinned, pulling his bike free "What do you want to do Big Bill?" The taller teen shrugged.

"I just don't want to be alone tonight."  
The honesty of it still made Richie feel like he had been punched in the gut, even though Bill had told him this before. He did his best to push the sadness away and made his legs work, following his friend on the street.

"We can crash at my place if you want. My parents won't mind. It's 'date night' so they will be out by nine."

"Sounds good to me. We could watch movies or something." Bill nodded, giving him that small grateful smile that always made it worth for Richie to offer. The butterflies were back of course.

They cycled to Richie's house in comfortable silence, basking in the last rays of summer sunshine. It was almost the end of September, but it was still pretty warm. The cold was yet to come.

They had a lot of time to kill before the arrival of night, so they decided to do the responsible thing and finish their homework for the weekend first. It was Bill's idea of course, but Richie never argued with him over this stuff. He knew Bill was right, and he even got help with his work so who was he to complain? The only thing that distracted him from time to time was Bill chewing and mouthing on his pen.

He often caught himself thinking how soft those lips looked, how he would have liked to switch places with that pen. Such thoughts just brought him trouble though, so he tried to ignore them and do his homework properly. By the time they finished everything and went over their answers together Richie's parents were leaving for the night.

"What do you wanna watch Big Bill?" Richie distracted himself with switching between the TV channels once they moved into the livingroom and got comfortable on his couch.

"Dunno. Anything will do." Bill only shrugged carelessly. So they settled on a cheesy horror movie with people dressed up in ridiculous costumes and horrified women screaming on the top of their lungs every two minutes. Richie went out to the kitchen at some point to get some snacks.

They munched on chips comfortably settled next to each other, knees and shoulders touching. Richie wasn't paying much attention to the movie at this point, maybe only absently looking at the screen for what's happening.

Watching Bill dig into the bowl perched in Richie's lap was way more interesting, especially since the movement of his hand felt more and more like it was on his skin as the bowl became emptier and emptier. He set it on the table instead, both relieved and disappointed.

Before he could notice another movie started playing, similar to the previous one. Richie's thoughts kept wandering back to that bikeride, watching Bill from the back. His skin itched with the urge to ask Bill what had been on his mind the whole day. His heart was pounding, thudding in his ear as his hands began to sweat.

"Hey, are you okay?"

Richie almost jumped at Bill's barely audible but concerned voice. He pulled his hands in his lap and began to fiddle with his fingers.

"Of course. Why wouldn't I be?" he grinned, but it wasn't convincing.

"You haven't been watching the movie. Nor the last one."

Shit.

"Oh. Uh--" Richie bit his lip and wrecked his brain for some kind of an excuse, but he was out of those.

"You can tell me," Bill's voice held no urge, only sincere concern, eyes searching. Richie was sure his heart was going to burst.

"Can I see your back?" of course it stumbled out of his mouth. Of course, at the worst possible time. No wonder he was called Trashmouth, he thought to himself bitterly.

"My back?"

"Y-Yeah."

Bill, bless his heart, actually shifted on the couch to have his back to Richie. It actually made Richie smile and his heart calm down a little.

"I meant uh, without your shirt."

He didn't expect Bill to do it, but he grabbed the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head without a question.  
Richie did his best not to faint on the spot.

He had seen Bill without a shirt before. Of course. But it was different now. He felt fidgety, itching to ran his hand over the exposed skin.

"Can I...touch?"

"Go ahead."

It was better than Richie imagined. Bill's skin was warm and soft, which made him a bit anxious if his hand was cold or sweaty. But Bill didn't complain, shoulders hanging relaxed. He ran his hands from Bill's shoulders to his waist, and felt the skin shift under his fingers ever so sightly, felt those muscles stir.

"R-Rich." he pulled his hands back, lower lip caught between his teeth as Bill turned around to face him. He was caught up in staring at the taller teen's torso and abdomen, his own skin growing hot. He couldn't read Bill's expression. He didn't look angry or disgusted, maybe curious and...something Richie couldn't place.

"Sorry..." Richie tore his gaze away.

"Don't be," Bill touched his arm, fire spreading from the tip of his fingers. Richie shuddered. "Tell me."

Richie opened his mouth and closed it, swallowed and flexed his fingers. Bill could read him too well, damn him, he thought. He wasn't really upset about it though. It was one of the many things he loved about Bill. He always paid attention so carefully.

"I can't."

"Why not?" Bill tilted his head, thumb now drawing circles on Richie's forearm. It was distracting.

"Because," _I love you so much_ , is what he would have said, but he knew better than that. "I just can't."

"You can tell me anything Richie. I love all of you. I'd give you anything, you know that."

Richie bit his lip. Those words shouldn't have made his stomach flutter the way they did. His sense of control was slipping under Bill's gentle touches and absolutely calm demeanor. What was he supposed to say though? All words escaped him when he really needed them. But words are wind, and actions speak louder anyway.

So he decided to take a leap of faith. He cupped Bill's cheek in his palm and brought their lips together.

Bill froze.

Richie panicked for a moment, mind going crazy over the thought of having messed up, until he felt Bill press back against him. He moaned softly as Bill pulled him closer, practically sitting in his lap by now, and ran his fingers through the taller teen's hair. He felt long fingers dip into his hipbone and he shuddered against Bill.

They came apart slowly, looking straight into each other's hooded eyes. Seeing Bill like this, his reddened cheeks and softly panting lips, it sent a shiver down Richie's back. HE had this effect on his best friend.

"You look so good like this." Richie couldn't keep the words down this time. He smiled as he trailed a hand down Bill's torso and felt him lean into his touch.

Bill caught his lips into another kiss.  
Richie was dizzy with excitement and lack of oxygen, the blood rapidly pumping in his veins.

And Bill could kiss. Gods he could kiss.

Richie felt weak already when Bill gently nudged his lips apart with his tongue, drawing a soft moan from the raven haired teen. He could barely form coherent thoughts as Bill stole his breath away and his fingers traced the lines of his back, dipping straight down to cup his ass.

Richie moaned with a buck of his hips and detached their mouths, breaths coming shortly.

"Bill." Richie whispered into the small space between their lips, cheeks burning, a familiar pool of heat finding its way down to his belly.

"Sorry. Got carried away." Bill didn't sound too sorry, hands still absently holding him from behind. Richie didn't mind that one bit. He had to wonder though.

"Are you sure you want this?" whatever this was between them. Whatever they were doing. He couldn't help the anxious thoughts of this being only a spur of the moment thing. His heart would have split in two if that were true.

Bill's eyes were slightly darker than before, but held the same amount of affection and care as he stared back at Richie.

"I wouldn't have kissed you back if I didn't." he simply said. And that made sense but...

"What about Bev?"

"Bev and I...she is like my sister. The Losers are like family to me. But," he lifted one if his hands to tuck a strand of messy black hair behind Richie's ear, caressing his cheek with his thumb. "You've been here for me more than anyone ever has. For that, I love you more than you think. I would never kiss them they way I kissed you."

It shouldn't have been so easy to melt his heart, but Richie found himself to be weakened by Bill's sincere words of affection. He held back a sob and hugged the taller teen tightly. Bill wrapped both of his arms around Richie and held him close, like he was something precious. It made Richie's heart throb in the best ways. He sighed happily, and drew back.

"What do you want to do next, Rich?"

Richie bit his lip and shifted in Bill's lap uncertainly. They should probably have done more talking, but he felt restless. His parents could come home at any moment and find them like this. That would be bad. But now that he had Bill holding him like this, half naked and flushed, he couldn't ignore his obvious erection. Nor the fact that Bill was hard too.

"I think," Richie wet his lips nervously "We could go to my room instead. I-If you want to."

Very smooth Richie, he thought to himself annoyed.

Bill smiled and kissed him lightly anyway. Richie let out a relieved breath against his lips as he did so, jumping a little when Bill pat his buttcheeks playfully.

"Let's go to your room."

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading this thing! I just kinda had to let this out of my system.  
> Should I write a clumsy part 2? About the two of them upstairs? *wink wink*? Ok I'll stop. Let me know in the comments what you think!
> 
> Comments and kudos are very much appreciated as always :3


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